Color Blind and Tone Deaf

By Captain Boxers and the Fences

What do you do if you are the CEO of a struggling digital security company, living in one of the major urban centers of a country that is experiencing protests related to race relations and police brutality? According to sources, you issue an apology for sending out a strongly worded message about the language that will not be tolerated during these difficult times, because all lives matter.

Many of us have been there. We have rushed to do the right thing without having a deep understanding of the problem. The lesson here is to have a trusted group of people read company-wide messages before sending them out. For everyone who has done that for me, words cannot express my thanks deeply enough.

Expensive Rented Spaces

By Captain Boxers and the Fences

Some friends at a struggling digital security company related the events of a recent, monthly all-hands meeting. The CEO was explaining how people who lived within forty-five miles of one of the company's facilities would need to begin reporting to work at the nearest facility. This would be a fairly large change for the predominantly remote workforce, and no small cost for people near the London office. Sadly, all of those rented offices were very expensive. If the company was going to that expense, the offices needed to be used.

It is my understanding that one of the many intelligent, solution-oriented people the company employed asked if it made sense to continue renting the office space in New York since it served only two people — one of whom was the CEO. What followed was a tense and defensive monologue, in which the CEO essentially stated that the predominantly remote workforce spent most of their time in their boxers.

For all of you who work remotely and put your heart and soul into what you do, this one is for you. Thank you for showing up fully engaged almost every day, no matter what time it is where you live. Thank you for building great quality products that solve problems for your customers. And thank you for wearing clothes when you are on camera.

45 Mile Boundary

By Captain Boxers and the Fences

Some friends at a struggling digital security company related the events of a recent, monthly all-hands meeting. The CEO was explaining how people who lived within forty-five miles of one of the company's facilities would need to begin reporting to work at the nearest facility. This would be a fairly large change for the predominantly remote workforce, and no small cost for people near the London office. Sadly, all of those rented offices were very expensive. If the company was going to that expense, the offices needed to be used.

It is my understanding that one of the many intelligent, solution-oriented people the company employed asked if it made sense to continue renting the office space in New York since it served only two people — one of whom was the CEO. What followed was a tense and defensive monologue, in which the CEO essentially stated that the predominantly remote workforce spent most of their time in their boxers.

For all of you who work remotely and put your heart and soul into what you do, this one is for you. Thank you for showing up fully engaged almost every day, no matter what time it is where you live. Thank you for building great quality products that solve problems for your customers. And thank you for wearing clothes when you are on camera.

Roadmap of my Future

By Pedaling Serpent

Have you ever been asked to schedule a meeting with several people who have impossible schedules because they do really important things for the company, by someone whose job it is to deal with the purpose of the meeting, only to have that person cancel your meeting ten minutes before it was to happen? Me either. If that had happened to me, I would have been furious.

For all of you who have gone above and beyond for someone who clearly did not appreciate the effort, you have been heard. Take a long walk. Update your resume. Then make some popcorn and watch the show. If the serpent doesn't go down in flames, that struggling digital security company will probably be a sad footnote in their investors' next annual report.

Mr. Enterprise and the Banana Army

By Malevolent Fruitcake

This album cover is about that guy who comes to all of your meetings because he doesn't trust the people from his team who also attend all your meetings. He has an agenda that he does not share until it is in danger of making the project late. Then he complains because no one allocated time to the features on his agenda. Worse yet, no one even asked if he had a hidden agenda. The outrage is real.

For every time you wanted to suggest a long walk off a short pier and instead worked with the delivery team and product owner to create a solution, this one is for you. Keep engaging Mr. Enterprise and his team. Keep having those release retrospectives. Keep thanking your teams for being flexible. And keep an eye on that liver. Mr. Enterprise will not be the death of you.

Escalate Then Communicate

By Malevolent Fruitcake

Have you ever found yourself in a hastily scheduled meeting with your boss — discussing how your project has gone off the rails — and wondered what planet everyone else was on? You thought things were fine. Someone expressed a concern. So the team discussed options and dealt with the situation. Apparently someone forgot to tell the Monday morning quarterback and micromanager from the team that services your support tickets. Now they have the CEO in a lather about something that was never reported to their team, because your teams already dealt with it.

Thank you for being a rock star. Thank you for supporting the people who get the work done. Thank you for not contributing to the drama. You are appreciated. You make the world a better place.

Passive Aggressive Strain

By Malevolent Fruitcake

Have you ever worked for a struggling digital security company and read a comment from a coworker on Linkedin about the lack of value they placed on the work you were doing, and been surprised because they had not discussed their dissatisfaction with you? Me either.

For those of you who have read the article and the comment, you have been heard. Keep getting out there and doing the good work of helping the teams. They need you. The guy who won't give you the opportunity to address his concerns — maybe not so much.

Death March To Nowhere

by Red Flag

This was the album cover that started it all. One of my friends was working at a struggling digital security company. The teams she worked with were preparing for an important milestone in the release of the next version of one of the company's key products. Accurate estimates had been a challenge for the teams. The Director of Engineering whose direct reports were working on the project was becoming increasingly prone to micro managing the teams. He resisted all coaching toward helping the teams improve.

As the release date approached, he grew more agitated. Finally, he exploded in several team meetings, telling the teams they would do whatever it took to get the software out the door on time. The would have food delivered and have someone walk their dogs if that was what it took.

Meanwhile, the Product folks were trying to work with the teams in a more collaborative manner to make the release better. Could features be released later? Could the release be pushed back in order to deliver the product as originally envisioned?

When I heard about the pressure being put on the teams by someone who did not understand what his teams needed, it reminded me of a death march.